By Marla Lowder, Tanana District
R-E-S-P-E-C-T, can you hear it? Yep, that’s Aretha Franklin singing it. What a great song. The dictionary defines respect as “a relation or reference to a particular thing or situation; an act of giving particular attention; high or special regard.”
Everyone wants respect. But to get respect, we need to show respect. I see less and less respect among our young people and it makes me wonder where it is coming from. Is it coming from friends, TV/movies, families? I don’t know, but I know it is getting worse.
I had a friend one time and we would joke and sometimes call each other names that weren’t appealing. Another person asked me one day why we did that, and I said we were just joking and it didn’t mean anything. They said to stop and think about it. There may be a day when the other person is having a hard time and if you say something like that, even jokingly, it may hurt their feelings. I thought about it and they were right. I talked with my friend and said let’s have respect for each other and not do that anymore and we agreed.
There were kids hanging around us, and I think back and wonder what kind of example we were setting even jokingly. Did those kids learn from us that it’s okay to treat others that way? I hope not and I try harder now to be a better example for everyone. Do I mess up? Yes, but that is part of being human. The big thing is to admit it and learn from it.
Integrity is another word that seems to get forgotten. The dictionary defines it as “firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values; the quality or state of being complete or undivided.”
We all get to set our own integrity standards and they may not always align with someone else’s and that’s okay. That is what is great about being our own person.
Now let’s think about what happens when our integrity doesn’t match another person’s integrity. How do we handle that situation? Only you can decide that. However, let’s put the two words together, integrity and respect. Can they fit together? Can you disagree with someone and yet respect them? The answer is yes, if you want.
I know I have friends that I don’t always agree with, but I value their friendship so I respect their views even if their views don’t agree with mine. I show them respect and they do the same for me. These are the examples that we need to be showing our youth today. It is good to have your views and to stand up for them but do it with integrity and respect for others. These are attributes that I continually work on. I am not perfect, but I want to be the best example for the kids I work with.
4-H is a youth organization for youth K-12 that helps youth learn about certain items of interest to them, but also teaches them life skills. 4-H has a club structure with leaders who are adult volunteers with current background checks. To learn more about the local program, contact Marla Lowder, Tanana District 4-H agent, at 474-2427. You can also check out our web page at www.alaska4h.org/fairbankstanana-district.html. 4-H is a part of the Cooperative Extension Service of the University of Alaska Fairbanks.
